Thus Ends Another Hopeful Stab At Another Job…

December 9, 2002



Dear Adam,

Thank you for applying for the position of Web Developer for Americas Benefits, requisition # 812922. We had many inquiries regarding this opening. After careful consideration of your application, we regret to inform you that we will be pursuing other candidates for this opening.

Translation: ”Your resume was a joke, why did you even bother?”

We will retain your information in our candidate database for one year for the purpose of matching your job skills and interests to future job openings. You have the option of having your information automatically reviewed against the required skills for future job openings as they occur.

Translation: As soon as we received your resume it was in the trash bin. Unfortunetly, it left your email address in our address book, so to humor you we sent you this email.

Thank you for your application. We wish you all the best in your career search.

Translation: ”We hope you never apply with us again, let alone get a job with us, and hope you die a terrible death.”

Sincerely,
Hewlett-Packard Company

I wasn’t really holding my breath for this, but it would have been nice to at least get the second interview. Even if it were to just humor me. I didn’t tell many people about this, in fear of jinxing myself. Guess it doesn’t matter… I’m never going to get another good job, am I? JOY! Happy Birthday 2 me! Excuse me while I go kill myself.

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